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What comes after a funeral? Understanding wake traditions

Published: 20/9/2023

As you navigate through the process of saying your final goodbyes, you might find yourself wondering what comes next. After a funeral, it's common to hold a gathering called a wake: a meaningful way to remember our loved ones and find comfort in the company of friends and family.

What comes after a funeral - Understanding wake traditions
What comes after a funeral - Understanding wake traditions

The wake: A time-honoured tradition

Wakes are a tradition deeply embedded in many cultures and customs. The gathering, which usually occurs after a funeral, provides an opportunity for loved ones to come together in a more relaxed setting. The wake is a time for friends and families to share stories, support one another, and celebrate the life of a loved one who has passed away.

Remembering and sharing memories

A wake isn't just a sombre occasion, but rather a chance to celebrate the life of the person who has passed away. Often held at a family home, local hotel, pub or a restaurant, the gathering allows loved ones to reminisce about the departed's life, sharing stories and memories.

Finding comfort in community

Grief can be an isolating experience and wakes serve to counteract that feeling by gathering with others who share the same grief. The presence of friends and family who are going through a similar emotional journey can remind you that you're not alone. Bonds are strengthened, and a sense of unity grows from difficult times.

The role of food and drink at a wake

Food and drink play an integral role in a wake for they act as an offering of care and sustenance during times of sorrow - a time to replenish the body and the spirit. Sharing a meal or a drink also helps foster feelings of togetherness and support.

RELATED ARTICLE: Organising a wake: A guide for you

Honouring religious and cultural beliefs

Wakes can take on different forms, depending on the religious and cultural beliefs of the family. In some cases, religious customs or prayers might be incorporated into the gathering. It's important to respect the wishes of the family and to honour their traditions during this difficult time.

What comes after a funeral - Understanding wake traditions
What comes after a funeral - Understanding wake traditions

A time for closure and healing

While the funeral service often marks the last goodbye, the wake servs to the ongoing process of grief and healing, an opportunity towards closure. By sharing memories, finding support and connecting with others who are mourning, you can take the first steps towards accepting the reality of the loss.

Planning a meaningful wake

If you find yourself tasked with planning a wake, remember what matters most is creating a space where people can come together and find comfort. Choose a location that feels right for you and accessible to those who will be attending. Consider incorporating elements that reflect the personality and interests of the departed. Whether it's displaying photographs, playing their favourite music or sharing their hobbies, these personal touches can add a special touch to the gathering.

RELATED ARTICLE: What is the most beautiful funeral song?

Moving forward while remembering

As you navigate the emotions following a funeral, remember that grief has no timeline. Everyone processes loss differently and as cliche as it sounds, there really is no "right" way to feel or heal.

A wake gathering is a testament to the enduring power of community and the shared bonds of love to those closest to us in times of grief. Through stories, laughter, tears and shared moments, wakes can become a beautiful tribute to the person who has passed -a reminder that their spirit lives on in the lives of those they loved.

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